Whose plans?

It has been quite a while since I’ve posted on my blog. One reason is because I have been going through an intense period of transition over the past few months. Another reason is because, quite honestly I’ve been dealing with a period of intense Spiritual struggle. Allow me to explain:
The decision to delay my departure for China was by no means an easy one. I think to some extent I felt like a failure for telling literally everyone I knew that I would be leaving in July and that I believed God wanted me in China this upcoming year and then not going. There really was no way I could have gone. I hadn’t raised close to the amount of support I needed. But I had faith that God would provide! I believed that God would bring in every cent that I needed to go. When the money didn’t come in, I felt as though my faith was misplaced. And perhaps it was. See, it’s taken me a while to realize that our faith should not be in what we believe God can or will do for us. Because many times God does things in our life contrary to what we think He should. Looking back I understand that my faith should not have been in God to provide the money I needed but my faith should be in God. Period. Whenever our faith is in God + something else and that something else doesn’t come to fruition we can become discouraged and confused. Many times in our lives we find our plans colliding with God’s plans and when His will is done we can become bitter and angry because we feel we didn’t get our way. But if we live our lives in constant submission to His will then He will give us the Grace to praise Him whatever may come our way. Whether it be delayed plans, poverty, car problems, the death of a Child, loved one or some disaster we can rest secure in the knowledge that the God who loves us and redeems us has a plan for our lives that is far superior to ours.
It wasn’t until God brought me to this point that I could truly thank him for delaying my trip. He has opened up so many new doors for me and I am excited to see what His plans are for me over the coming year as I continue to prepare for China!